Pink RockStar...And We Have Been Charmed

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Well dang, I don't feel sick, in fact I feel fabulous, strong, vibrant and my biceps have been looking pretty good lately in the gym!

 I have breast cancer? Not possible, not ever.  If you were to pick the poster child for health and fitness, it might be me. I have darkened the doors of every gym in the tri state area...for the last 20 years.  I think I have taught every person in SC how to do a step class, and I can out cycle anyone in the spin room. I am kindoff a freak about my fitness, nobody is freakier...at least nobody I know.  I have two precious children, Marshall is 9 and Sophie is 7. 

my boys

Don't forget Big Daddy, my Knight in Shining Armor. He promised me he was born lucky. "I'd rather be lucky than good." he always tells me. "Stick with me mama, we are going to live a charmed life." 
And we have been charmed.  

my birthday party last year, a little crazy
I can't believe that dooky was growing
in my booby.

We were married when I was 34 after I thought I would never ever find the perfect man. He was 32 and we were ready for a family. Our wedding was the best day of my life. It was July 14, 2002. Two months later we were attacked by terrorists in New York and he was in the city. He stood and watched the second tower fall. One month later we were expecting our precious baby boy. On our first anniversary we cradled a 7 day old baby. 
And we have been charmed....
We have frolicked, we have vacationed in Mexico, we lounged on the beach, we bought a new house, we made friends.  Our second child was born two years later. Sophie is the daughter I have dreamed of my whole life. 
And we have been charmed....
We have grown our children, holding hands, singing songs and loving life.


And we have been charmed.

biopsy bruises, actually pretty nice looking in
this pic, didn't want to share too much booby! Ignore
my chewed up nails...stress....

And then it was September 23, 2011 and I got the call from the sweetest nurse on the planet. "Precious, I have the biopsy report. So, the biopsy shows you have Ductal Carcinoma Insi tu." What is that, what on earth,  I have never heard of it, but, carcinoma sounds bad, my head was spinning, I looked at Chan, I fell to my knees, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't talk, I couldn't look at him. We hung up with the nurse after writing down everything that she said. We hugged, cried, felt weak. Looked at each other, held hands and decided to call our parents. I told Chan, call your daddy first, practice on him before you call my mom. So, we picked up the phone, called my father in law.  Chan couldn't speak, words would not come out, he choked. My father in law was scared, "what's wrong, Chan? Are you ok? Chan?" Finally Chan managed the words, , "It is positive, she has cancer." My father in law was quiet, "We can handle this", he said. "We will do whatever you need." I was encouraged, lifted. We called my mom, she was brave, but she couldn't fool me, she was scared, so was I. 


So, we spent the next four days hitting google, every search teaching me more and giving me more questions. I know this:


Ductal Carcinoma In Situ:
1 in 8 women will be diagnosed with breast cancer.


Ductal carcinoma starts in the tubes (ducts) that move milk from the breast to the nipple. Most breast cancers are of this type.

I snuck this pic when the doc was out of the room!! I am so nosy!
The black circle in the bottom right corner is the mass, it is
so tiny, 8mm. 

Ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS) is the most common type of non-invasive breast cancer. Ductal means that the cancer starts inside the milk ducts, carcinoma refers to any cancer that begins in the skin or other tissues (including breast tissue) that cover or line the internal organs, and in situ means "in its original place." DCIS is called "non-invasive" because it hasn’t spread beyond the milk duct into any normal surrounding breast tissue. DCIS isn’t life-threatening, but having DCIS can increase the risk of developing an invasive breast cancer later on.

When you have had DCIS, you are at higher risk for the cancer coming back or for developing a new breast cancer than a person who has never had breast cancer before. Most recurrences happen within the 5 to 10 years after initial diagnosis. The chances of a recurrence are under 30%. 

(from Breastcancer.org)

Because of increased screening with mammograms, the rate at which DCIS is diagnosed has increased dramatically in recent years.

While DCIS isn't life-threatening, it does require treatment to prevent the condition from becoming invasive. Most women with DCIS are effectively treated with breast-conserving surgery and radiation. from Mayoclinic.com

So armed with these facts, we were ready scared, but, ready. 
I will share what's going on with my journey here, I was going to write a separate blog, but, this is all me, the workouts, the motivation, the recipes for my favorite salad, the breast cancer.
 I hope that this will help someone in their journey. Please share with whoever you think will like/need/read/appreciate this ramble. 
I am sure that some will gasp, she's writing about her cancer? Really? Isn't this supposed to be private? But if you know me, I can't keep a secret, I am transparent, I share everything, good, bad and cancer. 
I keep saying, "I am a rock star, watch me rock this!" But, I am scared and small. I need to be brave, hate to be pitied and can't stand to shrink away. So, stand beside me as I journey through my next life journey. Send me your thoughts, send me your love, WE got this~ 

my 'sister' Ranie, she is my Delaware RockStar.